Broken Link
by LilAnimeOtaku
Summary: Van and Hitomi are in an on again off again relationship. It's obvious they both care about eachother but with Van paying more attention to his new friend then to Hitomi, can they ever have the relationship they dream of? AU and Strong Language


Hitomi heard it over the phone.  
Typing.  
Van was typing. She could hear it.  
"Who are you typing too?" Hitomi demanded harshly, her fingers clenching.  
"Dilandau." Van said, pausing slightly, realising what a mistake he had just made.  
Hitomi felt the anger and hate start up again, feasting away at her insides slowly, "You're suppose to be talking to _me." _she sneered.

Van's heart stopped a moment before continuing to beatbeatbeat much like the way Hitomi was beating away his sanity. He couldn't take much more of this. This un-certainty the paranoia. But he couldn't lose her. Hitomi hung up the phone and gave Van the all-to familiar and lonely flat tone of an empty line. Her childish hissy-fits. her insecurity made oh-so-obvious. the heart on her sleeve. he had fucked up again.

Hitomi couldn't believe it. She knew she was making it to noticeable that she secretly resented Dilandau and Van becoming friends - last time was to risky. She was worried now the phone would crack underneath her anger, that she would scream.  
"I don't like it when you're on the phone and talking to him." she said hotly.  
"I know - I know, but I -"  
"Stop. Talking. To. Him." she cut Van off, what a pathetic soul.  
Van stuttered, "But I -"  
"Now. Do it now." she spat.  
Van felt helpless. The love of his life, and his friend. How had he managed to do this?

It seemed like he had a knack for ruining things. Full of self hatred and rage. Why couldn't he just say it? Just say it. "I love you." The words raced through his mind. "sayitonthecountofthreesayitsayitsay123justsayityoumotherfuckin gfuckfuckfuck" gibberish.

"If youre not going to say anything then GOODBYE." Hitomi whispered harshley but clearly.

"Wait!" Van shouted before he could lose his nerve.

It was now or never. Now or later and later would be to late for sorries and apologies because she was to good for that.

"Hitomi.." he started, repulsed at the vulnerability in his voice. "i...I..." stuttering, like a dumb thing. Hitomi waited impatiently, her fragile ego bracing for the blow.

"I...I'm sorry!" Van finally shouted. It seemed apologies were his forte. "What a pussy." he said to himself as he heard the click of Hitomi hanging up on the phone and hanging up on their chance of ever having the relationship he dreamed of.

Hitomi shook in anger. He had said he was sorry again. Again! How many times must he tell her that before it actually MEANT anything? The lies, and the problems it caused.  
She looked at the phone, "I HATE YOU." she shrieked, and then saw her reflection up at the mirror.

Hitomi lowered her eyes in self hatred. She was a monster. She made herself sick, speaking to the man of her dreams like that. Hitomi wiped her eyes furiously, fighting back tears. She could hardly see the numbers as she dialed.

It rang and it rang and and a quiet voice spoke, "Hello?"  
"I'M SORRY, Van. I NEVER MEANT TO BE RUDE TO YOU," she sobbed, fighting back all her emotions, "Please, please, don't hate me!"

Van had just ripped the t-shirt off his head, in order to wipe the tears away. tears of rage at himself. the fragile girl who he had shattered like glass being thrown on concrete. "DAMMIT! DAMMIT GOD DAMMIT" he shouted into his pillow, muffling his cries. He wasnt afraid to cry, he would never cry for anyone else but he would cry for her. she deserved everything he could give her but tears would not be enough because tears cried in a moment of self-pity alone, could never compare to the tears he could never show her. the phone rang. he wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his shirt. "dont sound like you were crying, Van." he told himself before answering.

"I DIDNT MEAN TO BE RUDE TO YOU" the words sounded forced and quick. Van smiled. He knew it was going to be okay. She did love him. and he her. She was the one. "What a twat ive been!" he thought. "Hitomi...I love you!" he said, never being so sure of anything in his life. 2 plus 2 is four, the sky is blue, grass is green and I am in love with Hitomi!

Her heart swelled with happiness, "Oh, Van! Let's never fight again!" she smiled broadly, content with her relationship now.  
"Never again." he swore to her as well, and Hitomi felt herself brimming with love and happiness.  
Everything would be okay, she knew it now. Nothing could tear them apart now. They were as strong as they could be now, their love would be written about in songs.  
"Oh, Van..." she sighed happily to him.  
"Hitomi..." he said. His life felt complete. He had everything he could ever want or need. Hitomi. No more shit clothes or videogames, he would dedicate everything to her. she had his soul, and his heart. she was his, and he was hers. Their love had been mapped out in the heavens, destiny guiding them all along to this moment. He was going to marry that girl one day.

Hitomi thought about their lives together. She tried not to be haunted by the past. She remembered when he had cheated on her before - what if he did that again? What if he hurt her again? Suddenly she felt as though perhaps she made a mistake. Perhaps she couldn't trust someone she had known for three years and who had cheated on her twice. Her faith was shaken suddenly, like the ground shook beneath her very feet.

"Marry me!" Van said. Tears brimming his eyes.

"I...have to go." Hitomi said before hanging up. Van couldn't believe it. The complexity of the girl was amazing. What had happened? What had gone wrong? Things always seemed to be like this, an out of control roller coaster that never ended. Sooner or later it would have to crash and burn.burnburnburn leaving nothing but ashes and broken memories of a bruised heart.

With a sigh, he returned to the computer.


End file.
